36

On this, the eve of my 36th birthday, I look back at the last decade or so and wonder where it all went. I think of the people I know and love, I think of everything I've experienced. Most of all, I think of everything I didn't do and wonder why. Time? Energy? Not enough brain? Laziness?

I'm pretty sure I can figure out some of the reasons why. I know that sometimes, I require cajoling and prodding to do something outside my comfort zone, and that once I do it, I'll wonder why I never did it sooner. This past year has been sort of an example of what I can do if I just give myself the chance.

For one thing, I finally moved into a place of my own. This has been mostly successful and I am mostly happy with things the way they are now. I miss the upstairs but I am grateful for my own space and being able to do my own thing, by default, without bothering anyone else. This includes walking around without pants, something that's very liberating.

I've started listening to podcasts. Now I know some of what Jago and Dr. Teeth are talking about. I've heard a bunch of them in Jago's car, but now I've discovered ones on my own that I enjoy. They range from celebrities to movies to RPGs to science to sex. I have a wide variety of interests.

Something I never thought I would do again--I took over a non-profit society and am running it with two other people. That's right, Pure Speculation is now under (partly) my control. I am helping to guide the Festival and the board. After my unfortunate stint as President of my old choir, I thought I would never want to be in charge again. It turns out that I'm passionate enough about the Festival to want to take that risk. So far, so good, but it's been easy days yet. The tough part comes in the coming months.

I got myself a girlfriend. Who would have thought that a girl like the Rose would have been interested in a guy like me? Despite some turmoil over the holidays, we're good now, and it seems that she'll be sticking around until November now! Won't that be grand?

I took on a new thing at work, something that would both challenge me and get me out of the rut I'd been in. That and some new initiatives on the horizon mean that I'll likely never be bored at work again. At the very least, I will always have something interesting to do. I'm certainly looking forward to it.

About the only things that aren't new or risky are my health and Apocalypse Kow. Kow is still going on but we're not really doing anything new yet. As for my health, well, I've been gimpy or achy more often than not, and I'm sure I'm over the 200 pound mark. I've been feeling heavier and slower, and my belly looks huge. Now that I have more time in the evenings, I think it's time to get back into the gym for some cardio, some weights, and a whole lot of stretching. The ol' posture's been getting crappier too.

So how doe a 36-year-old ninja celebrate his birthday? For one thing, he doesn't celebrate it on his birthday. It's been so long since I've done any birthday stuff on my birthday. The last few years have just been crazy busy at this time of year. This year, however, I decided to do something big: MEAT COMA! Yeah, that's right, approximately 20 friends and I will be dining at the new Pampa Brazilian Steakhouse. You've probably seen their brand of rodezio dining on television. It's where they bring you meat... on giant skewers! You just pick your meat and they'll cut it onto your plate, and they'll keep doing so as long as you want them to. There'll be a lot of contented meat babies after that one.

And the day after that, dinner with the family. I doubt I'll need to eat in between, though. So no, nothing exciting, but as I grow older, the need for giant frolicsome celebrations of yet another spin around the sun seems to wane. Maybe I'll do something big and bold when I hit 40.